Lover Of The Least

What is Sexual Integrity?? You don’t want to miss this book on Saturday!!!
Every Man’s Battle: Winning the War on Sexual Temptation One Victory at a Time (The Every Man Series)

Our Stories

Eph 5:3 “must not even be named among you”

“A Banquet of Glistening Flesh” “Lithe figure”……and then BLAM!! Right into the back of a Chevelle!!!!

Although I had committed my life to Sandy, I had not committed my eyes to her. 10 more years of darkness until I realized I needed to change how I looked at women.

Hope for the Hopeless…………….5 years in CA…..4 full time girlfriends……sleeping with 3 and engaged to 2….”He’s a hopeless pig!!!”

Paying the Price……….No one’s getting hurt!!

Brothers:

Really enjoyed yesterday morning and meeting our newest Brother, Vince.  Always good to see the wise sage, Bob Miller, as well.  My wife reminded me this morning of our wedding almost 25 years ago and the wonderful songs that were sung.  This is one of our favorites:

I said that I would die for Him,
I really thought I could
But there I was denying Him
I never thought I would!
I failed the Lord, I let him down,
After all He’s done for me;
And now He’s walking up a hill,
A hill called Calvary.

Calvary, Calvary, was it meant for Him?
Was it meant for me?
Calvary, Calvary;
Is that my cross He’s taking to Calvary?

He found me in my sin and told me,
“Go and sin no more,”
And ever since that day I’m not
The way I was before;
I only came to thank Him for
The life He gave to me;
But there He’s going up a hill,
A hill called Calvary.

Calvary, Calvary, was it meant for Him?
Was it meant for me?
Calvary, Calvary;
Is that my cross He’s taking to Calvary?

Calvary, Calvary, was it meant for Him?
Was it meant for me?
Calvary, Calvary;
Is that my cross He’s taking to Calvary?

Many of you also missed a great hike at Bad Creek…….we will plan another next week.
Next Saturday, its Esteem……the last act of love our wives need from us……..CHAPTER 14
Treat your wife well and “your prayers will not be hindered” – 1 Peter 3:7

• Live In UNDERSTANDING
• C-O-U-P-L-E = all connected to Esteem = the 6 parts of Love to your wife
• Cherish and Esteem her and she will not sing with Aretha – “R-E-S-P-E-C-T”
• Song of Solomon 7:6
• Proverbs 31 – Do you Rise Up and PRAISE your Wife in Public???
• The Most Loved Woman on Earth!!
• Your Love Motivates her Respect, and her Respect motivates your love!
• Her Self-Worth = Tied to the Family
• Symbols Count to Women – Song of Solomon 8:6
• Birthdays are a Big Deal – Only Women Give Birth — Jeremiah 30:6– Thank God for that!!!!!!!
• Anniversary = Big Deal
• Hey Blake……..let me show you my Wedding Album…..”do you think the Tux made my Butt look fat??
• Take your Pick —-A Rock or a BMW???  Which one will she remember??
• Learn How to Read Her Mind!!!  By giving her options………
• You make me Happy!  Your Wife wants to make you Happy!  She gets her Esteem from making you Happy

You make me feel so young
You make me feel like spring has sprung
Every time I see you grin

I’m such a happy an individual
You make me feel so young
You make me feel there are songs to be sung
Bells to be rung and a wonderful spring to be sprung

And even when I’m old and gray
I’m gonna feel the way I do today
‘Cause you make me feel so young

Make her Feel Esteemed by:

• Opening the Door for her
• Speak highly of her
• Try something new with her like HCG or Reset/Detox
• Notice her hair or Clothes
• Tell her you are Proud of her

For Better or For Worse? Will you still love me for worse or just Better??
Don’t Joke with this one – Song of Solomon 2:10
WHY do you love me? Let me Count the Ways…….
Do you remember WHY you first loved your wife? Why do you love her today? Has anything changed??
Are you a ONE-Woman Man?
Don’t Look………not sot easy on this Swimsuit issue planet – Job 3:11
“Until Death do you part” or Is it “Until Divorce Do you part???
Don’t Leave Home Without One – American Express Card?
“Going through the Big D and I don’t mean Dallas” – Never say the “D” Word
Malachi 2:14-15 – For I Hate Divorce
Robertson McQuilkin – Proverbs 20:6 – 42 years of debt
Did Tammy Wynnette have it right? Stand by your……………………
Part of a Woman’s spirit = Loyalty – Be Especially Good to your Daughters
Golf or Your Wife’s Funeral? Tough Choice??
Things to Consider:

Why does your wife speak more highly of you in public than you speak highly of her?
Get involved in her life and what she likes to do.
Help make decisions with the children.
Do not correct her in front of the Children.
Stop gawking at other Women.
Make sure the Kids Respect her.

C-O-U-P-L-E: PEACEMAKING

• Connectivity = Definition? “We just know it when it is present and when it’s not.”
• The 4th Side to Connectivity = Peacemaking
• Some Conflict is Good but don’t let the sparks burn down the house.
• Isaiah 54:5-8
• Those who marry will have trouble……I Cor 7:28
• Husband and wife should not act independently but act together. I Cor 7:3-4
• Getting Historical = Reconciliation
• Real Men Say They Are Sorry…………I Peter 3:8
• Romans 12:18
• Don’t just Drop It……….Address it…….don’t shut down a conversation.

When first reading the title of this chapter – Listen – my first thought was that of Lewis Grizzard in his book, “They Tore Out My Heart and Stomped That Sucker Flat”…… “How much is this going to hurt and how long do I have to listen?”

And then, I read the second Chapter……..”This might Sting a Little”……..and its true……Listening can Sting!!
But Peter advises in 1 Peter 3:7 – “but live with your wives in an understanding way.”

Trust her heart
“as unto a weaker vessel.” – because of her vulnerability in the marriage in two ways: 1) is it worth to try to understand you, and 2) dishonor her by treating her as less than an equal “fellow heir of the grace of life.”

• Copper vs. Porcelain – different functions
• “Handle with Care” – Porcelain cracks easily. “Delicate and worthy of Honor.”
• C-O-U-P-L-E principles are connected
  Closeness and Openness are very similar – Understanding plays off Closeness and Openness = As you draw close to your wife and are open with her, she will sense that you are also trying to understand her.
• Does Listening to your wife Sting sometimes? Is it time consuming? Non-value added? Or perhaps it just bores the hell out of you?
• But you have BLUE hearing aids, not PINK! You don’t do little round tables in coffee shops very well. You don’t listen with empathy!
• Sarah and Spanish……….like Heather and Mandarin!!! Did I solve your problem? No, not really, but I feel much better!!!
• Do you need a solution or just a listening ear??
• Have you ever heard of Axle going out for coffee with Crow Bar to simply “release his emotions” and have Crow Bar listen about his hurt and pain?? As they look deeply into each other’s, Axle feels understood and loved by Crow Bar because he took the time to listen.
• Not me, sorry……….I call a buddy and its normally……..”This SOB owes me $46,000…….how do I get my money?….any ideas??
• AS a MAN, I want Solutions, ANSWERS……..I could care less that you feel my pain!!!
• Lets just TALK………..Not an option in a marriage!!! If you don’t talk to your wife, she will blow off the top of the tea kettle!!
• My wife says……..you never share your work with me or open up like I do………No….I am a Man, I do not need to share every little detail of what I had for lunch and why I liked one salad dressing over another.
• Schedule Time for Listening to your Wife.